Heartbeat.

After the day was over, the night starts to crawl in and wishes you with a smile by showing you the shining moon and stars hanging across. After a fruitful fun day, or maybe the most shitty days of our own maps and history, the day is over. The night follows up and tries to tell you that the day is over - you deserve to rest.

There are some nights where I just suddenly sat on the floor outside my house on my porch, looking at the sky. Somehow it soothes you, and somehow its some saviour to tell you that you finally went through this day. It's over. If it's bad, it kinda reminds you not to repeat this day ever again. If that day is cheerful and what everybody wish that it happens everyday, it is right there reminding you, make tomorrow be as sweet as today.

There are some of the days when night hits the sky, I felt a heavy amount of pressure was being lifted off. I never know what will happen tomorrow, but it wish that the things that I have right now would always be with me.

These days I felt heavy. No, not that heavy, although I am.

But I just have a lot in my mind. There are times where I lay on my bed, motionless, with millions of thoughts creeping in my mind. I don't know what to do, where to head to, how will all these going to end. Early in the morning, I woke up. Without a word. Without a sound. I just coil myself in the corner of my bed. I have no idea what I was doing. I remember I just sat there, not remembering whether did I even breathe or not.

Fight the fight, as Apefight said.

I was so tired. Drop dead tired. Every brain cell of mine wants to rest so bad. There's nothing to do but to hope for a miracle. For something or someone to save me from the hell hole I've created for myself that very day.

Every drop of blood traveling along my fragile vein. Every deep slow breathe I take. Hoping for something. But, I have no idea what is that something. One of those moments where you crave for something so bad, but in reality the thing that you crave is actually nothing or you don't even know what you want.

Do you have one of those moments? Where you woke up in the morning, and you pack your bags. You go somewhere or some place near, just to take a walk. Just to breathe, where your heartbeat listens to you this time, and slowly pump on the rhythm you have always crave from your hectic and dramatic life? And just walk. With music in your ears, and just slowly people-watching. Where the clear sound of tick tock is away from you.

The peace, the silence.
The white noise, the rhythm.
The beat, The steps.
The sense, the touch.
The hope, the dreams.
But most importantly,
the miracle you have waited for, to save you.

Good night, world.

Love,
Mongie.